Often when having Get To Know Verdi calls (free 20 minute consults) with potential clients Marguerite and I realize that what a client is searching for, but doesn’t know exactly how to verbalize, is financial health. Financial health is akin to mental health -- one’s emotional and psychological well-being -- but is focused on two areas: 

1. Strong financial systems and metrics

2. Positive emotional reaction to money and financial decisions

The first aspect is usually what I think of as the nuts and bolts of our work. If we’re working on personal finance with a client that could mean anything from debt elimination to creating an investment plan. If we’re working on business finance with a client that could mean anything from creating projections for the next quarter to determining appropriate pricing for their products and services. This piece of the puzzle is about numbers. It is about making sure that the math works out. But, the numbers alone don’t tell us the exact path forward -- they definitely tell us what not to do, but they usually also show several good options. 

That’s where emotional reactions come into play. 

The second piece of the puzzle is less quantifiable, but is how final decisions are made. It is about making sure that your financial decisions are aligned with your values and make you feel good. This work is actually largely the same regardless of if we’re working on personal or business finances. It often means helping a client figure out the root cause of their negative emotional reactions to money and financial decisions and then figuring out how to create a replacement narrative that serves them better. For example, it may mean walking a client through a process to figure out where they first learned a negative financial behavior -- maybe from a family member or friend -- and then discussing how that negative behavior was emotionally reinforced over time. This emotional detective work is key to reframing and building new narratives that serve clients. 

Often this work is casually sprinkled in throughout our work together, but not talked about explicitly (i.e. I help a client figure out why she doesn’t want to price her products a certain way and then we figure out a pricing strategy that helps her reach her revenue goals while alleviating the emotional stress that the first option brought up). Sometimes it is really explicit. This could mean that either Marguerite or I notice a specific emotional block that comes up over and over and we address it head on or it could mean that creating a healthy emotional relationship with money is a goal in itself. Regardless of how we address this aspect of financial health, it is always part of our work.

XOXO

Last week Safiya Bouhouch of I Am Well shared a piece on mindfulness. In it she explained that a mindfulness practice doesn’t have to be super complicated - instead she recommends starting with three steps: hydration, meditation, and breathwork. Meditation and breathwork can seem slightly daunting to me on busy days, but I always feel like I can hydrate! So, since last week I’ve been working on making sure that I drink at least 8 glasses of water a day. And you know what? It is amazing. My skin is clearing up after a few weeks of frustrating breakouts, I have more energy throughout the day, and, most importantly, my thoughts are less muddled and I’ve gained back a bit of optimism that seemed to have disappeared in 2020. 

In fact, I started feeling so optimistic that I let myself get carried away with what else I thought I could achieve. I started thinking along the lines of, “If I can drink enough water and help my skin and clear away some of my anxiety, maybe I can make some other mindfulness tweak (meditation let’s say) and then finish everything on my to do list! You know, that real to do list that is a million miles long.” 

And that’s how I got to the subject line in today’s newsletter. You, unlike me in my moments of hubris, probably know that doing it all isn’t possible.  

Except, maybe, like me, a part of you really hopes that it is possible. You know it isn’t, but you can’t help but hope that with the right advice you’ll figure out what you’ve been doing wrong and all of a sudden you’ll be able to do everything you want all at once. I know I feel that way, and it is certainly something that comes up with clients. 

But, we all know deep down that we can’t actually do everything. There simply isn’t enough time. And, the older I get the more thankful I become for that fact. Having to choose means that I get to focus on the things that make me happy and prioritizing forces me to be more thoughtful. If I could do everything then nothing would actually be that special. 

Prioritization is necessary in all aspects of our lives -- we can’t do all the smart financial things at once because we don’t have enough time, money or support to do so. And that’s okay! The problem often is figuring out what in our list we actually should focus on first. So, if your list looks something like this: 

Buy a home

Save for retirement

Save for taxes

Save for emergencies

Save! Save anything!

Make a will

Find a financial coach

Figure out what to do with that old account

Find my login information for that IRA I haven’t looked at in ages 

Reach out to my CPA

Pay off my credit cards

Look into a personal loan

Open a business account

...and you’re not sure where to start, I have a quick piece of advice. Order the list based on how time sensitive each item is and then only focus on the first three things. You won’t get it all done immediately, but you’ll start making progress and knocking down that first domino is often the hardest part. 

Oh, and go drink a glass of water. 

XOXO

P.S. If your list feels daunting and you’re not sure what is actually the most time sensitive or you know, but you don’t know how to actually do the thing then financial coaching may be a good fit for you! You can schedule a free call with us here.

Marguerite and I talk about mindfulness with our clients regularly, but we don’t always use that term. Instead we ask clients to consider their emotions when they are dealing with their finances. We ask them to “check in” and use that information when creating goals and plans. Those check ins are crucial for creating new money habits that are sustainable for their lifestyle and aligned with their values, but sometimes, in order to really get aligned, it is important to go a step further.

I’ve recently realized that my additional mindfulness habits have become a little shaky. As such, I’m not positive that how I’m dealing with my money is fully aligned anymore. This happens naturally over time since our values and lifestyles change, but it has been a bit more extreme for me than in the past because of how drastically my life changed in 2020. My first child was born in September and since then almost every waking moment (and, tbh, most sleeping moments) are focused on her. 

I’m not sure I’m actually misaligned, but I do want to be sure, so I can figure out what money habits and goals I need to change. Since I no longer have the same flexibility in my schedule, I’ve had to modify my old habits for my new life: 

I’m thrilled to announce that the incredible Safiya Bouhouch of I Am Well Community will be sharing a guest post next week. She is much more knowledgeable about mindfulness techniques than Marguerite or I will ever be and is planning on sharing a few gems that can help us all on our money mindfulness journey.

XOXO